Aug 13th 2008 2:07PM by Ryan Wilson (author feed)
Filed under: Bengals, AFC North, NFL Fans, NFL Rumors

In news that, well, seems about two years overdue, Chad Johnson is apparently contemplating a name change. And while “Ron” or “Lyndon” or “White Shoes” seem marginally logical, Johnson is going in a different direction. Via MDS at PFT: We’ve learned that Johnson has taken the first steps in the state of Florida toward legally changing his last name to Ocho Cinco. …

If Johnson follows through on this, his actual, legal name will be Chad Ocho Cinco, and the NFL would then (we assume) allow him to put his new last name on the back of his jersey. MDS also points out that NFL players can make a nontrivial pile of dough through jersey sales, and assuming “Ocho Cinco” jerseys would be wildly popular, there’s no reason to think Johnson isn’t using this as a marketing ploy.

Which is why NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, who appears to have the sense of humor of a robot not programmed to have a sense of humor, might be interested in nipping this in the bud before it gets out of hand.

Here’s to hoping this works out for Johnson; if he wants to legally change his name, no matter how idiotic-sounding, I’m all for it. My only regret is that he didn’t go with “Dr. Porkenheimer’s Boner Juice.” That would’ve really moved some merchandise.